Stop Catering To The Rude

Stop Catering To The Rude
by Rob Cottignies

No statement holds less truth than “The customer is always right.”

Anyone who has worked in many industries- especially retail- could attest that customers can indeed be very wrong while acting horribly at the same time.

Many of us have seen instances (recorded or in person) of an employee getting screamed at by a customer. If we find out what caused the incident, it’s usually something trivial, such as the employee made a simple error. Call the employee on the mistake, sure, but often the customers act as if they’re in charge and are owed compensation for the “hardship” they’ve had to endure.

Sadly, they frequently get it.

Where did this sense of entitlement come from?

My theory is a lack of repercussions. Rude people are more often catered to than reprimanded for being bratty. Throw a fit in a restaurant and the manager is more likely to “avoid a scene” and reduce your bill than let you embarrass yourself by publicly whining.

Obnoxious behavior should not be rewarded.

I’d argue this mentality starts at a young age because of parents who don’t follow through on threats. Any company which goes out of its way to make sure every customer is happy- even though that’s impossible- is also to blame.

…

After a shift at a bar, a guy I wasn’t familiar with opened the door (which had an obvious ‘closed’ sign on it) and walked in. I feigned politeness and told him we had closed 30 minutes earlier.

“I know. I just wanted to look around.”

The nerve of this guy, right? The bar had a lot of artwork and other things worth looking at, but the basic fact is it was closed and he knew that before entering.

Viciously angered by his entitled attitude, I…… said nothing and let him look around. The only reason I didn’t lash out against his blatant rudeness was that the bar wasn’t mine. I knew the owner would prefer to let the guy look around, which he did for a little bit before leaving. Had it been my own bar, perhaps it would have gone differently.

Was any harm done by this guy looking around for a few minutes? Most would say no but I disagree. Harm was done by him getting his way when he shouldn’t have.

Most people would not walk into a clearly-closed business or would at least knock and ask first.

So why did this guy get away with something which was purposefully rude, ignorant, and technically illegal?

The main argument keeps the business in mind.

If I (justifiably) scolded that potential customer, he could have told many other potential customers to not visit the bar, therefore (again, potentially) missing out on income for the company.

Social media and public review websites have given this small group a sense of power, which leads them to acting as they please, often with no ramifications.

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Speaking of online reviews, I read some negative ones about a certain business. The owner replied with paragraphs full of apologies, promises to improve service, and pleas for the person to give the place another chance.

I personally know those reviews were unjustified but even if not, they were incoherent ramblings made by people who were seemingly determined to have a rotten time regardless.

Why would you want someone like that to visit your business? Of course money is a factor but have some dignity. Don’t sink to their level and be rude, but trying to lessen their negativity so your 

business doesn’t “look bad” is just as harmful of an idea.

To note, I also read positive reviews, of which there were many. They largely had brief, vague responses from the owner, if anything was written at all. It was sad how the complainers were catered to while most decent reviewers went ignored.

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How many of us rate a home service (such as a plumber) highly simply because the person showed up within the given time frame? Shouldn’t that be understood?

Arriving when you said you will is the minimum of what’s expected, but often enough doesn’t happen, so it has become praise-worthy. Then the person does an adequate job and we commit to being customers for life.

The metaphorical “bar” has been set so low that rudeness is excused and one level above ‘terrible’ is considered exceptional.

And what happens when the person doesn’t show up within the window?

I’ll usually give a few extra minutes but after that will call the company intent on cancelling the appointment, only to politely ask where the person is and accept tardiness because I need the service done and don’t want to go through the process again.

Admit it, you’ve done something similar.

…

But do you know who definitely would’ve caused an uproar?

Karen. Or, better yet, “Karen”.

This fairly new stereotype refers to any (usually white) woman who aggressively complains when something (usually trivial) does not go her way.

In the case of the late plumber, I’d be on Karen’s side. Regarding everything else, she’s the worst.

Karen is seen as entitled and gets confrontational when it is not justified, such as demanding to see a manager when something small goes wrong or even by being overtly racist with seemingly no good reason.

Stop catering to “Karen”. Each time you do, you excuse her rude behavior, indirectly encourage her to act that way again, and make yourself look weak in the process.

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For a related side note, the United States Postal Service has a facility in Utah dedicated to mail which has been addressed sloppily. Somewhere around 1,000 employees decipher this mail (with surprising success) and send it where intended.

An argument could certainly be made for jobs. Again, a thousand people work at this place. But the excuse that some people simply have awful handwriting? I don’t like it.

If someone doesn’t have the consideration to write an address legibly, why should the already-stressed postal service take time to figure it out?

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(One more example although you probably understood my point right away.)

Have you ever been driving when somebody who did not have the right-of-way obstructed your path? 

Did you keep going anyway and hit the dummy?

Probably not. Neither have I, and that makes us part of the problem.

I was once stopped at a light when a guy (on foot) seemingly waited for my direction to turn green before slowly crossing in front of me. I honked and he stopped to challenge me to a fight.

This would be much more interesting had I accepted the invitation or simply run him over, but no. I sat there and waited for this rude and brazen fellow to get out of my way, nearly missing the end of the green light.

There’s this pesky thing called the law which sometimes inhibits people from bettering society with a lesson learned and/or public service whoopin'.

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For one last story, I missed a flight because the airline messed up. A couple and I got to our gate only to hear the plane had already left.

The couple expressed their anger by directly blaming the employees at the gate and demanding to get on the very plane which had already left. They screamed and attracted attention, but the staff mostly just let them vent. When they looked at me for support, all I did was make it clear I didn’t know them.

When the couple got tickets for a flight a few hours later along with free drink vouchers, they were still ranting.

Annoyed by the situation but understanding that things like this sometimes happen, I jokingly asked the frustrated employees if I should scream as well or act reasonably. I was given a first-class ticket on a flight an hour later.

Being decent can be worth it.

(And yes, first class is awesome, but probably not for the insane prices airlines charge for it.)

I hope the couple somehow learned a lesson but never found out what the airline did for me, if only for the employees’ sanity.

…

Let’s stop giving in to rude, inconsiderate people. If they are denied what they want more often, maybe there will be less of them. Handle the situation appropriately and you should earn more respect from spectators who are not horrible.

Call people out but do so respectfully. This gives the illusion that you don’t want to tear their face off and dance on it.

Applaud places for not putting up with “Karen”.

Do what you can.

I’m not instructing anyone to run their cars over inconsiderate jerks to hopefully teach a lesson, but I’d gladly appear as a character witness at your trial.